I imagine a loveless marriage would be miserable and unfulfilling. It would be terrible to share a life with someone where love does not dwell and thrive. As with all marriages, the day of the wedding is a day filled with love and hope for the future! The couple holds hands with each other and pledge their lives to one another, so thankful to have that special one as their lifelong spouse. In many marriages, somewhere along the way, something happens and that great love goes missing. No longer do the couple wake up with the enthusiasm of spending another day with each other. No longer do they cherish their moments together. As I said, a loveless marriage would be miserable.

With that said, I want to point out that love is not an emotion, love is a determination. I’m sure in your wedding ceremony, you said words to the effect of PROMISING TO LOVE ONE ANOTHER until death parts you. You PROMISED to love for the rest of your life! Do you understand the implication of that statement? Hopefully you gave it great thought before you made the promise. It means that you understand that you have control over who you love, and you promised to love your spouse ‘as long as you both shall live.” Your love for your spouse is not a fleeting emotion that changes with every interaction. It is a determination. You DETERMINED and PROMISED to love your spouse for the rest of your life. I hope you think about this and realize the importance of your promise…a promise that you made not only to your spouse, but to the Lord, also.

The Lord has very clear instructions for the husbands. We read in Ephesians 5:25, “Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it.” The husband is instructed to love his wife in the same manner that Christ loves the church. He sacrificially loved His church. He gave His life for His church. The husband is told to love his wife with that same kind of love…sacrificing his life to ensure the happiness, well-being, security, and comfort of the woman that he promised to love for the rest of his life.

For the wives, they should have this truth instilled in them from the time they were young girls. We read in Titus 2:3-4, “The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children.”

Is there no love in your marriage? You have the responsibility and ability to PUT love in your marriage. If you both are believers on the Lord Jesus Christ, then I urge you both to kneel before the Lord and ask Him to help you love each other like you should. Is it too late for happiness in your marriage? Not at all. Fight for your marriage. Love the Lord together so that you might love each other as you should. (293.4)