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I can fully relate to these questions, for I had the very same questions before I came to know the Lord Jesus Christ as my Savior. In order to answer them, I would direct your attention to the first human God created, Adam. I would encourage you to read Genesis 1:26-2:25 where we see God creating man in own image, giving him dominion over all things on earth, having fellowship with Adam and blessing him with an earthly paradise and a wife to share in it all. In a word, the first man Adam was blessed beyond description! God too was blessed, for in Isaiah 43:7 we hear God saying, “I have created him for my glory”, and Adam did indeed bring glory to God. Revelation 4:11 tells us, “Thou hast created all things, and for Thy pleasure they are and were created”, and so God also derived pleasure from Adam as he walked in obedience to Him. So far, so good! But then that fateful day came, as seen in Genesis 3:6, when Adam chose to disobey God by eating the forbidden fruit and that act of disobedience plunged Adam and the human race into sin and its terrible consequences.

In Genesis 3:8 we read that Adam and the woman “heard the voice of the LORD God walking in the garden in the cool of the day: and Adam and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord amongst the trees of the garden.” In love, God went looking for them and when He asked Adam where he was, Adam replied, in verse 10, “I heard Thy voice in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked; and I hid myself.” What do we learn from Adam’s answer? The answer to this all-important question is the answer I needed to hear years ago and it may indeed answer some of the questions you are having. Adam was now AFRAID of God and tried HIDING from God…but why? We may very well say, “Because he had disobeyed God and didn’t want God to see him in his naked state.” That would be true, but there’s another reason. Because of SIN, Adam was now an ENEMY OF GOD. Romans 8:7 teaches us “the carnal mind is enmity against God.” The moment Adam sinned his mind was corrupted and he had hostile thoughts towards God. He now thought God hated him and would destroy him, so he hid from Him. Adam was dead wrong, for God, in love, went after Adam to offer him forgiveness and we learn in Genesis 3:15, 20-21 that God announced the good news of a Savior for Mankind,  that Adam believed it, and that God covered Adam and Eve’s sin and shame with the sacrifice of an innocent victim.

Because of Adam’s sin, we were indeed “born sinners.” And you are right in saying “it was not our choice to be born into this world.” But the fact is, we are here in the world whether we want to be or not. Some people are like the ostrich who sticks his head in the sand; they refuse to acknowledge the truth that there is a God and that they are a sinner. Thankfully you are facing the truth head on, so there is hope for you. But you must realize, as we saw above, that because of sin you are in a state of hostility towards God and this has caused you to have wrong thoughts towards God. Dear friend, He loves you more than you can realize and He wants to reconcile you and change your thinking. Listen to Paul’s words in Colossians 1:20-21 to those who had believed the good news of Jesus Christ, “And, having made peace through the blood of His cross, by Him to reconcile all things unto HimselfAnd you, that were sometime alienated and enemies in your mind by wicked works, yet now hath He reconciled.”

To “reconcile” is to “bring about peace, and to restore harmony,” and if you will believe the good news that Jesus Christ died for your sins and shed His blood for you, God will reconcile you. After Adam believed in the Savior Who would come, his thoughts changed from hostility to peace and his fellowship with God was restored. I can assure you that if you will believe the gospel of Jesus Christ you too will change your mind about God and your fellowship with Him will begin! You will then be glad that He created you and you will “want this life God has given you.”  I would encourage you to read John 3 and Romans 3 and allow the Holy Spirit to open those scriptures to you. If you read them and believe them, you will not only be thankful for the natural life God has given you, but you will have “eternal life” and God will be the main object of your heart. And you will be the object of God’s heart as well, for we saw the humbling and precious truth that we were created “for His glory” and “for His pleasure.” You will then be able to bring glory to His name and pleasure to His heart!  (141.6)  (DO)