Listen: 51 Question 3

You are absolutely right.  God does hate divorce as we read in Malachi 2:16, “For the LORD, the God of Israel, saith that he hateth putting away…”  Let’s read Mark 10:6-9, “But from the beginning of the creation God made them male and female. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife; And they twain shall be one flesh: so then they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.”  When two people are joined in marriage, it is the Lord that makes them to become one person; one flesh.  Marriage is not something that is to be entered into lightly.  It is a lifetime commitment.  Vows are not only made to each other, but vows are made to the Lord; and He takes these vows very seriously.  He does not want anyone to undo what He has done.  The Greek word for “put asunder” is “chorizo” and is often translated depart or separate in the Bible.

Let’s read Romans 8:35-39 which says, “Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? As it is written, For thy sake we are killed all the day long; we are accounted as sheep for the slaughter. Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us. For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”  The word for ‘separate’ in these verses is the same word translated ‘put asunder’ in Mark 10:9.  From these verses, we realize that there is nothing that can separate believers from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.  Nothing!  This is how the Lord wants our marriages to be.  We should realize this sacred union should never be broken.  Divorce dishonors the Lord.  It produces adultery as we read in Mark 10:11-12, “And he saith unto them, Whosoever shall put away his wife, and marry another, committeth adultery against her. And if a woman shall put away her husband, and be married to another, she committeth adultery.”

With that in mind, let’s read Matthew 19:9, “And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery.”  The act of fornication can break the marriage vows and allow one to put away, or divorce, their spouse.  The Greek word for ‘fornication’ is ‘porneia’.  It literally means ‘sexual sin’.  It is where the word ‘pornography’ comes from.  Notice here that fornication is legitimate grounds for divorce.  That doesn’t mean that divorce has to happen in the case of fornication.  It is possible for a marriage to survive the act of fornication.  When there is repentance and confession of sin, the Lord is still able to rebuild and restore relationships.

While you may feel justified in ending your marriage; and perhaps you are justified in this, I encourage you and your husband to get some good, Biblical, Christian counseling before you divorce.  In the U.S., the divorce rates of Christians are about the same as divorce rates among non-Christians.  This is a sad comment on the state of Christian marriage.  If you and your husband will both humble yourselves before the Lord and ask Him to help you deal with this situation and restore your marriage, you will find that He will do wondrous works in your lives.