I was not familiar with the term ‘soul ties’ so I had to spend some time on the Internet to understand what you meant by that.  I have learned that a ‘soul tie’ is simply a sense that someone is meant to be in your life, and we can have soul ties with friends, lovers, family, and more. One therapist defined a soul tie as a “connection with someone that’s deeply embedded into your soul.”  In some New Age Christian traditions, soul ties are believed to be a result of having sex (though soul ties are not mentioned anywhere in the Bible.)  One said, “Often soul ties are thought to happen after you have intercourse with someone.”  It perpetuates the idea that if you have sex outside of marriage, you’ll be connected or “tied” to that person for life. 

In a practical sense, it seems that a soul tie is just having a deep, personal feeling towards someone, one so strong that you believe it was meant to last a lifetime.  Perhaps it is because of a sexual relationship that some feel this strong bond with someone else.  It is hard to define this in Biblical language because this term is not found in the Bible.  Let us look at some things the Bible does say about our relationships with others. 

For the Christian, we can look to the Lord to help us find the one person that is right for us.  When we honestly seek His guidance, He will give it to us and give us a bond with the person.  It is important to realize that believers should only marry believers as we read in 2 Corinthians 6:14-15, “Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness? And what concord hath Christ with Belial? or what part hath he that believeth with an infidel?”  For a believer to form a close bond with an unbeliever means they must find common ground other than the Lord…and that is extremely dangerous for the life and testimony of the believer. 

Do we need to be subject to the whims of our feelings?  Are we not able to determine who we will love as a partner?  Let’s read Genesis 24:67, “And Isaac brought her into his mother Sarah’s tent, and took Rebekah, and she became his wife; and he loved her: and Isaac was comforted after his mother’s death.” I encourage you to read Genesis 24:1-52 to see how the Lord revealed that Rebekah should be Isaac’s wife through the faithful work of Abraham’s servant.  You will notice that Rebekah was not forced to marry Isaac, but she chose to and Isaac, realizing this was the Lord’s will for him, married her.  It was then that we read that “he loved her.”  There is natural attraction to others, and we should expect that, but that is not nearly enough to base a marriage on.  There may be common interests and goals, but neither is that enough to base a marriage on.  As believers, we must seek the Lord’s will in helping us to find that person we should marry.  Then, after a time of getting acquainted with each other, learning about the other’s relationship with the Lord, and finding yourselves compatible in many ways, then the couple should spend much time in prayer and counsel before deciding to go ahead and plan for marriage.  That marriage should be “only in the Lord.” (1 Corinthians 7:39). 

If a person feels a ‘soul tie’ with someone because of premarital sex, that is defined as sin in the Bible.  We read in 1 Thessalonians 4:3, “For this is the will of God, even your sanctification, that ye should abstain from fornication.”  Ephesians 5:3 tells us, “But fornication, and all uncleanness, or covetousness, let it not be once named among you, as becometh saints.”  If we have sex with someone, it often causes our hearts to attach to that person, however premarital sex is fornication and is a sin.  To base a soul tie with someone based on an act of sin will most certainly result in great failure. 

How can you break a ‘soul tie’ with someone that you believe you should not continue to be with?  I encourage you to speak to your partner openly and honestly.  If there has been premarital sex, you both need to confess your sin to each other and to the Lord.  Ask your partner if they will pray with you so you both can hear from the Lord about the validity of this relationship.  Honestly ask the Lord to lead in this situation according to His good and perfect will.  (CC)  (628.4)