Let us look at those two verses.  1 Corinthians 7:9 says, “But if they do not have self-control, let them marry; for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.” (NASB).  The Lord has given some people the ability to live a single life.  Paul the Apostle had that gift and he never married.  So, he says in 1 Corinthians 7:8, “I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, It is good for them if they abide even as I.”  He is speaking of the fact that he did not have a wife and lived a single life.  However, most people do not have that gift and naturally long to be married.  They long to have a spouse to live with for the rest of their lives, to have children with, to grow old with.  In most people there is the desire to have a companion, a sex partner, a partner in life.  To desire those things and deny them to yourself, would only cause one to “burn with passion” for someone. 

Paul later writes in verse 28, “But and if thou marry, thou hast not sinned…”  For those who are not gifted to live a single life, it is only natural they would long to be married, and if they do marry, they have not committed a sin.  Indeed, God created the marital relationship when He brought Adam and Eve together and it was determined that “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.” (Genesis 2:24).  Indeed, marriage is a wonderful thing as long as we marry “only in the Lord.” (1 Corinthians 7:39).  This means that we only marry the one the Lord leads us to marry. 

Now, let us read Psalm 37:4, “Delight thyself also in the LORD; and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.”  This verse is in absolute harmony with 1 Corinthians 7:9. If we delight ourselves in the Lord, if we find our happiness in doing the will of God, He will bless us by giving us the things we desire.  Of course, when we truly delight ourselves in the Lord, our desire will be to have only the things He wants us to have.  If we desire a spouse and want to please the Lord by marrying the one He wants us to marry, He will bring that person into our lives according to His will and His time.  How precious is the love of God towards us.  He wants us to be happy.  He wants us to be content.  He wants to give us those things that will benefit us and honor Him. 

Have you ever seen a failed marriage?  Have you ever seen a husband and wife who cannot even tolerate the presence of each other anymore?  Perhaps these two did not delight themselves in the Lord.  Perhaps their desire was not to please the Lord, but to please themselves.  It is so important that we consult the Lord often when seeking a mate.  We should ask the Lord to lead us to that one who will truly be a partner with us in our living for the Lord.  Once we find one that we think is the one the Lord has for us, then we need to constantly pray together that the Lord will reveal to both that they should marry. 

If your desire is to marry, then delight yourself in the Lord, pray and ask the Lord to guide you in your search, and He will give you the desires of your heart.  (459.6)