You raise some very good questions, but I can assure you that some of your beliefs are simply myths and are not scriptural.  Let us look at what the scripture has to say about burials. 

The first burial mentioned in the Bible is in Genesis 23:19, “And after this, Abraham buried Sarah his wife in the cave of the field of Machpelah before Mamre: the same is Hebron in the land of Canaan.”  The Hebrew word for burial is the same as we understand it today.  It means to inter (entomb, put in the ground) the body of a deceased one.  Notice that Sarah was buried in a cave, not in the ground.  We do not read of any ceremonies or services for Sarah’s burial…simply that “Abraham buried Sarah his wife…”

 Genesis 23:8-9 tells us, “And he (Abraham) communed with them, saying, If it be your mind that I should bury my dead out of my sight; hear me, and intreat for me to Ephron the son of Zohar, That he may give me the cave of Machpelah, which he hath, which is in the end of his field; for as much money as it is worth he shall give it me for a possession of a buryingplace amongst you.”  This shows that Abraham bought this land for the sole purpose of using it for burials. 

Let’s move ahead and consider the burial of Abner.  We read in 2 Samuel 3:31, “Then David said to Joab and to all the people who were with him, “Tear your clothes, gird yourselves with sackcloth, and mourn for Abner.” And King David followed the coffin.” (NKJV).  Here we see there was mourning and a procession to the burial site.  In Luke 7:11, we also see an instance of a funeral possession in the city of Nain when a widow’s son died.

Let’s consider the burial of the Lord Jesus.  We read in John 19:40, “Then took they the body of Jesus, and wound it in linen clothes with the spices, AS THE MANNER OF THE JEWS IS TO BURY.”  By this point, it became customary to wrap the deceased’s body with spices.  Still, we do not read of a funeral service with speakers.  Verses 38-39 tell us that Joseph of Arimathaea and Nicodemus took the body of Jesus and buried it in a cave that belonged to Joseph.  Verse 41 says, “Now in the place where he was crucified there was a garden; and in the garden a new sepulchre, WHEREIN WAS NEVER MAN YET LAID.”  It was customary in those days to re-use a burial site.  The old bones were removed (possibly returned to the family) and a new corpse was put in the cave.  The Lord was buried in a “new sepulchre.”

The use of funeral homes to take care of the remains of the deceased is not such an old tradition.  The first instance of a funeral home was owned by Anthony Hay in Williamsburg Virginia in 1759.  With that in mind, we realize there is no scriptural instruction about how to conduct a funeral service.  There is nothing in scripture to restrict the services of one who died accidently or was stabbed to death.  To say that one in the family will die if the body is taken inside the house is just crude and frightening superstition. 

Of course, the most important death and burial is that of the Lord Jesus.  We read in 1 Corinthians 15:3-4, “For I delivered unto you first of all that which I also received, how that Christ died for our sins according to the scriptures; And that he was buried, and that he rose again the third day according to the scriptures.”  While the body of the Lord Jesus was buried in the grave, death could not keep Him.  Romans 4:25 tells us that, “(Christ) was delivered up because of our offenses, and was raised because of our justification.” (NKJV).  Do you know this risen One as your savior?  Have you trusted in Him for the forgiveness of your sins and to inherit eternal life?  If so, it can be said of you as the Lord said in John 11:25-26, “Jesus said unto her, I am the resurrection, and the life: he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live: And whosoever liveth and believeth in me shall never die. Believest thou this?”  Do you believe this?  (CC)  (503.6)