Let’s look and see what the Lord says to each member of the family.

TO THE WIVES: Ephesians 5:22-24, “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.”

TO THE HUSBANDS: Ephesians 5:25-28, “Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.”

TO THE CHILDREN: Ephesians 6:1, “Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.”

TO THE FATHERS: Ephesians 6:4, “And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.”

The Lord has a word for each of us, regardless of what role we play in the family. If each one would obey the Lord according to what He tells us in His Word, not only would we have a loving family, we would have families that honor the Lord and that give witness to His order for a successful family.

Today, it is considered sexist for the wife to submit herself to her husband. Somehow, many have overlooked the fact that a wife can submit herself to her husband and still be his equal. The Lord Jesus submitted Himself to His Father as we read in John 8:29, “And he that sent me is with me: the Father hath not left me alone; for I DO ALWAYS THOSE THINGS THAT PLEASE HIM.” Yet, He claimed equality with His Father in John 10:30, “I and my Father are one.” The husband and wife are equal in the family.

I do believe that if the husband loved his wife in the same way the Lord loves the church, the wife would find it very easy to submit herself to her husband. What is the characteristic of the Lord’s love to the church? He “loved the church, and gave himself for it.” The Lord loves the church sacrificially. When the husband truly gives himself to the happiness of his wife, she will desire to submit herself to him.

The husband and wife have the awesome privilege of bringing up their children in the “nurture and admonition of the Lord.” We train them through word and example to love and revere the Lord. We teach them that to obey us is to obey the Lord, and to disobey us is to disobey the Lord. That is the foundation for raising children. Our principles should be based on the Word of God, so we teach our children the Word of God. When they obey our principles, they are obeying the Lord’s principles. Notice that the Lord addresses the children directly in Ephesians 6:1, “Children, obey your parents in the Lord…” It is the parents’ responsibility to teach our children to obey God’s Word.

Lastly, fathers are warned not to provoke their children to wrath. This does not mean that we should go out of our way to make sure we do not anger our children. Not at all. All loving, godly parents will anger their children at times. However, the fathers should not try to exhibit their power in such a way that will anger and frustrate their children. It is so important to show your children that you seek to obey the Lord, even as you expect them to obey you.

To learn our roles in the home, and obey the Lord according to our position, will honor and please Him. This is the character of an obedient Christian home…all in obedience to God’s Word. (279.2)