Does it make any sense to pray and fast for a particular gender that you want?
I’m not sure what the inquirer is asking. There are two possibilities: 1) You’re asking if a pregnant woman should pray for the Lord to give her a SON or a DAUGHTER according to her desire, or 2) You’re asking if you should pray for the Lord to allow you to have a sex change (to change from one gender to another).
Let’s start with #1. We do have an example of this very thing in Scripture where a woman named Hannah, who loved the Lord, was barren and desperately desired to have a SON. We read in 1 Samuel 1:10-11, “And she was in bitterness of soul, and prayed to the LORD, and wept in anguish. Then she made a vow and said, ‘O LORD of hosts, if You will indeed look on the affliction of Your maidservant and remember me, and not forget Your maidservant, but will give Your maidservant a MALE CHILD, then I will give him to the LORD all the days of his life, and no razor shall come upon his head.” Hannah was a godly woman and was being persecuted by another woman for being childless (verses 6-7), which added to her misery. This was one reason for Hannah’s request for the Lord to give her a son, but her devotion to the Lord shines out in promising the Lord that if He did open up her womb and give her son, she would literally “give him back to the Lord” by having him become a Nazarite (one who is fully devoted to the Lord in a life of service…see Numbers chapter 6). Because of her humility and desire to please the Lord, we read in verses 19b-20, “And Elkanah knew Hannah his wife, and the LORD remembered her. So it came to pass in the process of time that Hannah conceived and bore a son, and called his name Samuel, saying, ‘Because I have asked for him from the LORD.” The Lord graciously opened up her womb and gave her “the gender she asked for” because she was willing to devote him to the Lord. If you read on in verses 24-28 you will see that after the child was weaned Hannah took him to the house of the LORD in Shiloh where she gave him back to the Lord. How wonderful are the words in verse 28, “Therefore I also have lent him to the LORD; as long as he lives he shall be lent to the LORD.” This example does NOT mean that any pregnant believer can ask the Lord for a specific gender and the Lord will give her what she wants, but it does illustrate that the Lord, in His grace, may do so if it is His will.
Regarding #2, if this is what the inquirer has in mind the answer is very clear. One should NOT ask the Lord to grant him/her a sex change. We read in Genesis 1:27, “So God created him, MALE and FEMALE He created them.” Now let’s read Psalm 139:13-16, “For You formed my inward PARTS; You covered me in my mother’s womb. I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; marvelous are Your works, and that my soul knows very well. My FRAME was not hidden from You, when I was made in secret, and skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth. Your eyes saw my SUBSTANCE, being yet unformed. And in Your book they all were written, the days FASHIONED for me. When as yet there were none of them.” We learn from the verse in Genesis that God is the one who determines one’s gender, not man. It is simply wrong to think that “God made a mistake” and now you’re going to correct that mistake by changing your gender. We learn from the passage in Psalm 139 that God formed your PARTS and FRAME according to His perfect will, and that it was all done SKILLFULLY. This includes every “body PART,” including your genitalia (i.e. MALE and FEMALE reproductive organs). He is the Creator and if we are subject to His sovereign will we will gladly accept who we are, male or female. The “transgender movement” that we are witnessing today is a blatant act of rebellion against God the Creator and every believer in Christ should be appalled by it. (DO) (630.5)