In a five year period, my teenage son who loves God has lost the ability to play sports, has lost the ability to participate in church choir, his siblings all moved away, he has lost an eye and finally lost his father. He now refuses to go to church. What verses would you share with him?
Before we consider any verses, let me say that we will pray for your son concerning all of the losses he has suffered. This is, admittedly, a lot for any Christian to experience, and especially for one so young in the faith. But we trust the Lord can turn this into blessing and will pray to that end.
Having said that, the Bible is very clear that the trials we go through are for a reason. Let’s look at Hebrews 12:5-11. In verses 5-8 we read, “And ye have forgotten the exhortation which speaketh unto you as unto children, My son, despise not thou the chastening of the Lord, nor faint when thou are rebuked of Him: For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth, and scourgeth every son whom He receiveth. If ye endure chastening, God dealeth with you as sons: for what son is he whom the Father chasteneth not? But if ye be without chastisement, whereof all are partakers, then are ye bastards, and not sons.” We have two vital lessons outlined for us in these few verses. How good it is to know that if God allows us to suffer in some way, it’s because 1) He loves us; and 2) We are His children. Satan would have your son to think just the opposite; that is, that if God really loved him he wouldn’t experience trials and that perhaps he’s not even saved. Yet all that he has lost PROVES he is loved by God and that he is a son of God! The Spirit of God is seeking to comfort the suffering saint in this passage and encouraging him not to “despise…the chastening of the Lord, nor faint.” We are prone to either one, to not be exercised at all by the trial, or to lose heart and grow weary. It sounds like your son has indeed lost heart by his losses.
Verses 9-11 go on to say, “Furthermore we have had fathers of our flesh which corrected us, and we gave them reverence: shall we not much rather be in subjection unto the Father of spirits, and live? For they verily for a few days chastened us after their own pleasure; but he for our profit, that we might be partakers of His holiness. Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peacable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby.” There is one grand lesson in this passage for your son (and all believers) to lay hold of; our heavenly Father is allowing trials FOR OUR GOOD! He wants us to “be partakers of His holiness” and to experience “the peacable fruit of righteousness.” We have seen the word “chasten” several times and we often equate it with the word “punish.” This is a mistake, for the word implies “instruction” and “discipline.” The Lord is trying to TEACH US LESSONS in the trials He permits! We saw that we may react to our trials by “despising” them or “fainting,” but our Father wants us to be “exercised thereby.” In other words, when we are suffering, we should go to our Father and pray, “Father, what are You trying to teach me in this trial?” If we do, we can count on Him to work in our lives and to produce “holiness” and “righteousness.” In short, He will cause us to grow and to be MORE LIKE CHRIST!
I would be remiss if I didn’t draw our attention to Romans 8:28. It says, “All things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to His purpose.” We often quote this verse but it’s at times like these that your son needs to claim it by faith. The “all things” of this verse would include “all the losses” he has suffered! Now is the time to BELIEVE IT! Take God at His Word and believe that all your losses are FOR YOUR GOOD! Like the portion in Hebrews 12, this portion is only for the true believer. You said your son “loves God” and here is a promise held out to “them that love God.” (157.10) (DO)