Should I keep tithing to a church where the pastor is divorcing his wife with no biblical grounds and is secretly pursuing another relationship with a church member until the divorce is final?
Scripture does address a course of action in this case but it depends on whether or not these things have: 1) Only been revealed to you, or 2) There is common knowledge by all in the local church, or 3) The church knows about it but is refusing to do anything about it. Let’s explore each of these cases.
1) If you alone are aware of these things you should act on Matthew 18:15, “If your brother sins, go and show him his fault in PRIVATE; if he listens to you, you have won your brother” (NASB). You should not “spread these things around,” which would be gossip; in love you should go to him and tell you know what he is doing that is contrary to Scripture and hopefully he will be convicted of his sin and repent. You should go to him in love and humility as we see in Galatians 6:1, “Brethren, if a man is overtaken in any trespass, you who are spiritual restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness, considering yourself lest you also be tempted.” If he doesn’t repent, then Matthew 18:16 instructs you to “take one or two more with you, so that BY THE MOUTH OF TWO OR THREE WITNESSES EVERY FACT MAY BE CONFIRMED.” Verse 17 goes on to say, “If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector.”
2) If this is “common knowledge” among all in the church, and he has refused to repent of his sin, the church should have an official meeting to “put him out of fellowship.” We read of this in 1 Corinthians chapter 5:1-2 where the Apostle Paul wrote, “It is actually reported that there is immorality among you, and immorality of such a kind as does not exist among the Gentiles, that someone has his father’s wife. You have become arrogant and have not mourned instead, so that the one who had done this deed would be removed from your midst.” In verses 3-5 Paul goes on to command them to have an “church meeting” and with the authority of Christ they should put him out of fellowship (see also verses 9-13).
3) If the church knows all about this unscriptural divorce and his relationship with the other woman and yet they are “turning a blind eye” and refusing to judge this sin among them, we have further instruction in 2 Timothy 2:17-21: “Among them are Hymenaeus and Philetus, men who have gone astray from the truth saying, that the resurrection has already taken place, and they upset the faith of some. Nevertheless, the firm foundation of God stands, having this seal, ‘The Lord knows those who are His,’ and ‘Everyone who names the name of the Lord is to abstain from wickedness.’ Now in a large house there are not only gold and silver vessels, but also vessels of wood and of earthenware, and some to honor, and SOME TO DISHONOR. Therefore, IF ANYONE CLEANSES HIMSELF FROM THESE THINGS, he will be a vessel for honor, sanctified, useful to the Master, prepared for every good work.” The two men in this case were sinning by teaching false doctrine. They were professing the Lord yet refusing to “abstain from wickedness.” In the analogy that Paul gives he exhorts THE INDIVIDUAL to separate from them if the local church is refusing to deal with these men who are sinning. We saw in the case at Corinth that “the man was to be put out of fellowship by the church” but in this case “the faithful believer must separate from the church which refuses to judge sin among them.”
As you no doubt noticed, I didn’t even mention “tithing,” for this church leader’s sin is so grievous it calls for serious action, not just refusing to put money in a collection plate. A church leader is NOT IMMUNE from being disciplined by the church. I would encourage you to read 1 Timothy 5:19-21 which shows that “elders” are accountable to the local church if they sin. (DO) (744.1)